You’re Not Lazy: How ADHD Affects Motivation, Focus, and Follow Through
(And Why It’s Not About Willpower)
If you’ve ever looked around your apartment, full of half-started tasks, unopened emails, and one cold coffee from three days ago - and thought, “Why can’t I just DO the thing?”
You’re not lazy.
You’re not broken.
You’re not failing at adulthood.
You’re likely struggling with executive dysfunction, a super common experience in ADHD.
Let’s talk about what that really means - and why therapy can help you move from self-blame to self-understanding.
What Is Executive Dysfunction?
Executive functioning is the part of your brain responsible for:
Planning
Starting tasks
Finishing tasks
Prioritizing
Managing time
Switching gears
In ADHD, these systems are often underpowered or inconsistent. You know what you want to do, but getting yourself to do it feels like trying to push a shopping cart with one busted wheel across a gravel parking lot. In the rain. While overthinking everything you've ever said.
Common Thoughts When You’re Stuck:
“I’m wasting my potential.”
“Everyone else can handle life, why can’t I?”
“Maybe I’m just lazy.”
“If I really cared, I’d be doing it.”
None of these are true. But they’re what happens when we treat motivation like a character trait instead of a neurobiological function.
🔍 Why Motivation Doesn’t Work the Same with ADHD
ADHD brains often:
Need higher stimulation to engage
Struggle with non-urgent, long-term tasks (hello, taxes and laundry)
Get overwhelmed by “where to start” paralysis
Procrastinate not out of defiance - but out of freeze mode
Add in rejection sensitivity, perfectionism, and burnout?
No wonder everything feels hard.
A Real-World Example:
Neurotypical brain: “I should do the dishes.”
✨ does the dishes ✨
ADHD brain: “I should do the dishes.”
👉 Thinks about it for 4 hours
👉 Gets distracted by a crumb on the floor
👉 Starts reorganizing the spice rack
👉 Sits on the couch feeling like a potato
👉 Spirals into shame
👉 Can’t do the dishes because the shame is louder than the to-do list
Sound familiar? You’re not alone.
How Therapy Can Help
In therapy, we work on:
Separating your worth from your productivity
Understanding the shame/motivation/procrastination spiral
Building ADHD-friendly structures and routines
Exploring self-compassion when you feel “behind”
Celebrating any momentum (yes, even starting the task and stopping halfway counts)
You don’t need to become a productivity robot. You just need support that works with your brain, not against it.
Final Thoughts
You are not lazy. You are not unmotivated. You are not failing.
You’re living in a world that wasn’t built for your brain - and doing your best with systems that weren’t designed with you in mind.
Therapy can help you feel less stuck, more empowered, and even a little kinder to yourself. If you’re ready to stop spiralling in self-criticism, I’d love to help. Book a consultation or join the waitlist today.